My feelings and I

Hooray! Here comes my winter break.. Unfortunately, it has shorten to a month.. I used to have 2 months winter break.. Thus, I'm going to fully utilize my ONE month holiday.. Gonna make it a wonderful and awesome holiday.. I'm so bored now.. Is 2.15am but my eyes are wide open. I thought of watching Vampire Diaries but seems like I am not in the mood for that. Anyway, I had watch X-Men First Class; it is a nice movie and has encourage me to watch all the other X-Men which I havent watch. So, spending whole night watching X-Men Dvds, I guess I need a rest before watching X-Men: Origins of Wolverine.. My mind is full of X-Men and nothing else.. LOL!

*Watched in a day*

Actually, I have something to blog about but I have no idea how to phrase all those in words. Sometimes, I cant understand why am I feeling so and sometimes I cant control how I feel yet I cant express it. Feeling is so incredible but complicated at the same time. It is undeniable too. At times I really wish I wont have such feelings but I cant stop myself from feeling so. Insecurity, Jealously, Anger, and ... I dont want myself to be too sensitive but I cant control. Most of all, I realise that some people really wants to be loyal but their feelings will betray them. That's why FEELING is uncontrollable and unexplainable. I really want to share my feelings with my loved one all the time but I CANT do so without any valid reason. What are FEELINGS and EMOTION? Bla Bla Bla..

So What is Love? Feelings? What about Friendship? Feelings for friend?

Sometimes I really hate myself being so. It always ended up with negative consequences. Wondering who could I share my feelings and thoughts with; the someone who can truly understand me or perhaps empathize me. Just like everyone; I hate being sad and emo. I wish I could make myself happy rather than depending on others to provide me happiness. I learn about putting too much hope may bring yourself most disappointment. As a young adult, what is your life about? What are your responsibilities? In relationship, how much effort can you put in? No one could measure the effort and love. To accept and endure are the actions which lied on your own hands. Tolerance or Compromise? What is the difference and which is the best? You may think that you are living in a warm and cozy house but in fact, all these are just a dream. A dream that you'll have to wake up eventually. My heart is always at the weakest point and I have no idea how to make it strong once again. Being indecisive is giving more problems than usual. A perfect dream would be the only thing I wish I could have at this moment. However, if I get to choose, I want to stay in the dream that I have right now. I love this dreamland of mine.